sociopath

Reading over diary entries... from the day the husband I adored( Antony Dala) disappeared from my world... I Still feel this way....After 23 years of an amazing marriage. Remember when we first became friends...? You had many problems, but we laughed every night, all night.... I Remember how I fell in love with you. We talked until the sun came up, for months on end. You told me how no one really understood you but me. You told me that I was your best friend. You would die for me and my son. You told me I was your soul mate. You told me you wanted to grow old with me. You called me dozens and dozens of times day and night. In the fullness of time we became a family and had 2 more amazing sons. My full time job was caring for you and them. I loved it...Sometimes you behaved badly, deceived me often. Veered between adoring me and hating me, which was torturous and provoked parts of me I didn`t know existed, NOTHING changed my love for you. Not even a Beating. Not even your "secret" online Porn “friendships”. or your out of control spending... I took you to doctors and counsellors and AA. I spoke for you when you could not. All the time hiding it from everyone. thus preserving your image of the perfect man. I laughed and cried with you, and when you felt "better” and “found yourself ”you simply moved on and cruelly told me I had stolen your life. How heartless, I wanted to die when you wrote that to me. You abandoned me without warning so fast my feet didn’t touch the ground. You Airbrushed me from your life...Mother of your children and your greatest support . I wish you`d given me the tools to heal but no, you denigrated me, negated me and your sons existence in a bid to give credence to your horrendous behaviour. I have something you will never have again. Our sons respect and daily contact. Why, why did you do this? My love for you and our boys is so great. We could have been friends and saved them so much heartache, You are a coward that`s why. Live with that. I would rather die.

me me - 19/04/2014 | report this review