How Not To Run A Carvery

My girlfriend and I discussed what the proper etiquette was involved with a carvery, she had never been to one before and wasn't exactly sure how it worked. A combination of disappointment and irony washed over me when I walked into the Lambton Worm in Chester-le-Street because the staff didn't have any idea either about how a carvery works either. For starters I would be disappointed, if blind Pew was responsible for keeping an eye on the Yorkshire puddings which were burnt to a crisp. To serve this as an introduction to the food to follow was an insult that Simon Cowell would have been proud of. Looking over the veg on display I felt a seething anger normally reserved for Gordon Ramsay before he sorts the restaurants out on Kitchen Nightmares . To be fair the meat was average which is what I was expecting so no real disapointment there. The biggest gripe I had was the roast potatoes which have been a firm favourite of mine since childhood. To me what makes a carvery is being able to help yourself to as much potatoes and veg as you like, however the party of 8 people we dined with meant rationing on a scale that the Blitz spirit was made of. I went first and if I had taken more than three potatoes the last person would have ended up feeling like Oliver Twist at the counter. The overall experience was very similar to school dinners and I can assure you that Jamie Oliver wouldn't have been impressed. The price seemed too good to be true from the offset and The Lambton Worm is certainly cheaper than it's rivals, however the rivals know how a carvery works and I am sure if we had chosen the alternative the explanation I gave my girlfriend on being able to help yourself would have been accurate. I feel I have misled her, just like the advertising signs at the pub. The irony of the last song of the evening really summed up the evening, as we paid our bill The Three Tops “When Will I See You Again” played and caused a wry smile in everyone because if I ever end up dining at The Lambton Worm again (and I can assure you it wont be my choice) I will go for a steak.

Dave Smith - 15/06/2009 | report this review